Thursday, September 17, 2009

Journal #10: College Application Essay

University of Toronto: Why I would like to pursue a major in the medical field

FYI: ITS JUST A DRAFT!!:DD IT WILL BE BETTER!!!

"Could you hold her leg up?" The doctor asked me impaitenly with a worried look on her face. But shes only 14, no I don't want her to see this" my sister says lying hopelessly on the delivery bed. I nervously held up my sister leg to the side of the bed. I just couldn't believe what I was doing and what I just saw. "1, 2, 3, 4 PUSH!"the doctor yells while my sister pulls off a big struggle to do it. I couldn't take it; My face is turning white, my hands are sweaty and I felt if I were about to puke. I let go of my sister's leg and passed out on the couch which was on the side of the bed. I can't believe I was in the process of helping my sister give birth. This event and the following others will be the main reason why I feel so passionate about the medical field.

It is now 3:00 am in the morning at Tripler hospital. I'm awaking from the knock out I had about 30 minutes ago from helping my sister give birth. As I awake I am amazed about what I see. There is not only 1 doctor in the room but 13 other different medical personals in the small delivery room. Midwives, doctors, surgeons, and nurses were all there to help my sister give birth. I was heartbrokened by the fact that my sister was having a hard time giving birth but I was so amzed about how passionate these doctors were to help my sister. After a C section my sister finally gave birth to beautiful baby girl. Instead of a normal 2 day stay my sister would have to stay in the hospital for 2 weeks to heal from the c section and fever she had gotten because of it.

"2 weeks at the hospital?, Ohh what a way to spend my summer. Locked up in a hospital" I kept saying to myself. But from the hesistant attitiude I had before, I actually enjoyed being in the hospital. My life at the hospital came out to be a custom routine. I remember how the nurses would come in to check vitals every other hour, how doctors would come in once every day to check on my sister. I remember having to wake up every other hour at night watching nurses help my sister with her medication, checking her IV and giving her shots. I felt like I learned a lot of educational and important lessons to life when watching these medical people everyday. I have seen how hard these people worked during late hour shifts and I give them a lot of props for that. Whenever my brother- in-law and I had a break from my sister he showed me around the hospital. My brother is a medic in the army so he is usually given orders to work at Tripler or Schofield. I have seen a different side of the hospital doors. Not the light pink and blue ones where babies lay but a different type of side where you see sickly, ill, and injured people. I was lucky enough to see open doors of sick paitents getting helped from nurses and people waiting to get checked in the hospital.

Finally my stay at the hospital had come to an end. I felt really sad about it, I really like life at the hospital. Even though there are many sad parts to it, it really did feel like I belonged there. My stay at the hospital has given me the strongest reason why I would like to work in the medical field. I have seen so many dedicated people work hard everyday to make sure people are okay. People in the medical field dedicate their lives to help and assure people's lives. I would also like to be one of those people; Strong, smart, and dedicated medical personals.

3 comments:

  1. Hey, this was a good college essay. It talks aobut how you felt in the hospital and about everything you heard and felt while your sister was giving birth. But I think you should say more about the doctors. you say that they persuade you to become a doctor but you don't really say how.

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  2. Hey Cin,
    I really enjoyed reading your college essay. A few pointers;im sure you know that there are some gramatical errors and some sentences are little bit lacking in structure. But I really do think that this is a great college essay because you actually let us know the reasons why you were so moved to be in the medical field.

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  3. Sorry Cynthia, but I think that I should fix my comment...

    Anyways, I think that you should give more detials about how the doctors helped you think about becoming part of the medical field. I think that you should express more about how you felt while watching your sister give birth, and how much standing by her side helped you realize that you want to be able to help people in the medical field. But I enjoyed your essay though. I just think that there needs to be some fewer adjustments:)

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